The Inconvenient Ironist
Rhymes with bite. Fables with fangs. Satire for
grown-ups
Come for the duck, stay for the prophecy.
🐾 One of the creatures you’ll meet here is Crump—a cat with a taste for control, a talent for one-sided deals, and a knack for annoying everyone equally.
Whether you love him or love to argue with him, he’s here to spark a conversation.
I discovered America.
Everyone says some Spaniard in fancy tights found it years ago—wrong! I discovered its true potential. It’s bigly big, the bestest ever, and everywhere else? Total disaster. Historic discovery!
(Crump the Cat)
Welcome to The Inconvenient Ironist —
a place where rhyme has teeth, stories wear disguises, and truth gets slipped in under the table.
Come for the duck. Stay for the prophecy.
These are not poems for children.
(Unless your child is unusually jaded and asks questions about imperialism before breakfast.)
This is satire that rhymes, because sometimes the most uncomfortable truths go down better with rhythm.
Think Orwell with a Dr. Seuss bounce. Roald Dahl if he got fed up with banks and warmongers.
A modern-day fable factory where emus occupy stolen land and cats give TED Talks on responsible government.
Here, you’ll find satirical poems and modern fables that challenge, unsettle, amuse...and occasionally make you snort tea through your nose.
They sound whimsical… but there’s more beneath the surface,
and they sing with truth, not with spite.
🐾 Want more golden nonsense and satirical musings?
Sign up for Crumpisms on Substack